When parents do not talk to their child about death, it is their choice. When parents do not talk with their child about charity, goodness, volunteering, and other such things, this is probably their mistake.
In July, the DaDobro Corporate Volunteering Center and the Center for Civic Initiatives Support hold an action “My Family”, dedicated to the Day of Family, Love and Fidelity . We asked the center to tell about charity for the smallest: how to explain to the child complex (but important) things, when is it better to do it and why to do it at all.
One volunteer family
Little Milan is only six, but she knows a lot about good deeds. The girl’s parents are volunteers, so Milan often goes with her mother to play checkers with lonely old people in a nursing home, and after kindergarten runs to walk dogs from the shelter.
“Four years ago, a colleague invited me to go to the orphanage with them for the New Year, and I immediately agreed. It was a very exciting trip. For a long time and responsibly I was looking for a gift for the baby – exactly the one he had been dreaming of for a year. I’m a very sentimental person, it seemed like I was overwhelmed before the trip, I even burst into tears at the thought that it is insanely unfair to such wonderful boys and girls to grow up without mom and dad , ”says Oksana Sarga, Milan’s mother.
“It was hard to get together, but it was impossible to refuse, ” Oksana continues. – We arrived, and then there was some kind of magic. Children, too, were preparing for our arrival – they sang and danced. And after the performances, we presented them with Santa Claus, and then I could not stop smiling. I saw how they were waiting for us, how they were preparing, they were so sincerely happy about the holiday that we prepared for them, and simple communication! Before leaving, we hugged for a long time, took pictures. I realized that my life will not be the same. “
According to Oksana, Nikita’s husband also quickly became involved in volunteer history. “When my daughter was 2.5 years old, they took her for the first time. Imagine, she was not even afraid of large and shaggy dogs, Oksana recalls. – Now she has grown up and loves to tell her grandmother or carers in the kindergarten how she walks the shelter dogs or how she plays with children from the orphanage. And every time she returns home after a trip to them, she goes through her toys and puts off that she will take the children to the orphanage the next time. ”
Challenges in plain language
Sometimes children feel the world even better than us, so there is no need to be afraid to talk to them about charity. Another thing is that if we take preschoolers and primary schoolchildren, then the brain of a child at this age continues to actively develop, and therefore the flow of information, no matter what was discussed, should be facilitated and fascinating.
Here are some questions to help you build a conversation:
Where does kindness begin?
Kindness begins with good kind thoughts and attention to oneself and others. When you see that something is going wrong with a loved one, or maybe even a stranger, or even an animal, you will not stand aside and help him. Kindness begins in the heart.
Why is being important good?
Helping each other, when we are not only kind in words, but also in practice, we make the world enjoyable for everyone and for ourselves as well. And also, it is not in vain that they say good people are happy, because it is a great happiness and an opportunity to help other people, and this makes us a little happier.
What good deeds can you do at home or at school?
Good deeds should come from the heart, so it is important to choose how and who you want to help, and do it with joy. Do you love animals? Start taking care of your pet yourself (for example, feed or comb out) to make the life of your mom and dad a little easier. Do you really love nature? The next time you go for a walk, grab a bag and gloves and collect garbage for a walk (you can call friends and do it together). And you can tell your classmates why you don’t need to throw out the batteries, and ask the teacher to install a small container for collecting batteries.
Who are volunteers?
Volunteers are people who do good deeds regularly, disinterestedly and voluntarily. As a rule, they help someone based on what they personally care about and what they worry about. They take people or animals under their care – they take care, visit, notice how they can help, and help. For example, they go every weekend and walk a guardian dog at an animal shelter.
When is it better to talk with a child
“The sooner you tell your child about volunteering, the better. The more you can put in him the good, the eternal. The main thing is to tell him about it in simple words: who is the volunteer, why does he help, why is it important to help. The easiest way to start is to explain the topics of ecology and animal welfare, ”says Dmitry Manin, vice president of the DaDobro Corporate Volunteering Center. – The sooner we explain to the child the need for caring for the world around him, the greater the chances that this will become his habit for life. It’s so simple: do not litter, turn in plastic and paper for recycling, turn off the lights and water, take care of animals. ”
Dmitry adds that parents should show everything they talk about in their own example (“like this, I wet my brush and turned off the water while brushing my teeth,” “and here we buy dog food from the shelter together”). Because without an example, it just doesn’t work.
“There are more complex topics that need to be approached more carefully, and they require more careful preparation. This is help for children and the elderly, especially if they have any kind of concomitant illnesses. Here it’s worthwhile to preliminarily tell the child about different difficult life situations, you can read together some kind of fiction on this topic, discuss. And only then to get acquainted with real cases, ” Dmitry advises.
Another significant point – do not allow jealousy on the part of the child, thoughts that you pay someone more attention than him. With proper delivery, the little volunteer will quickly understand what important business he is doing, and will do it with pleasure.
“My son is nine. I started talking with him about volunteering at about 5 years old, talked about our movement and main areas of activity. Of course, he bombarded me with questions: why am I doing this, what is the use of it, why spend my time on it, if you can spend it on yourself? Each time I tried to answer reasonably, explain in detail that in life there are different situations and cases when people really need help, ”Dmitry shares his experience. – And I see that these conversations yielded results: my son gladly sorts garbage at home and teaches his friends how to do it right; it helps in sorting and sorting things out for people in difficult life situations; travels with us to talk with old people in nursing homes. And I see that for him to do good has become a habit. And this is the most valuable. “