If you are in a serious relationship, it’s perfectly normal from time to time think that something is wrong. Like to quarrel, to disagree with each other, sometimes angry, sometimes wanting to be alone, but after all of this, of course, to tolerate and to understand that being together definitely better.
I think that your relationship is not what it was before? Not the first time that comes to mind is the thought of breakup? Love the person next to you, but at the same time understand that the time has come to change something? Then this text especially for you. In it are five signs that it’s time to end a relationship in which you trust psychologists.
A one-sided game
If you are the only person in the pair that sends messages to the spirit: “Thinking of you”, is planning something special for the anniversary and takes care in the details, whether it’s fried eggs in the shape of a heart for Breakfast or socks with Thor, which the partner had long dreamed of, it’s a red flag.
“It is a sign that relations exist only for one reason. And that reason is you says Well and Good family psychologist Chris Armstrong (Chris Armstrong). – The relationship should be a partnership, and the partnership – something that is invested two. If the relationship will continue in the same spirit of inequality, they can become quite exhausting”.
Trap “And I love you too”
In spite of everything, words mean a lot in a romantic relationship. This is especially true for declarations of love and compliments must be sincere and, most importantly, spontaneous. “When we are in a relationship but no longer feel the same partner as before, it is easy to maintain the illusion of love, answering, “me too” to every nice word in the address,” explains Armstrong. “You look great”. “You too.” “I am pleased to be with you.” “Me too”. “I love you”. “Me too.” All this is a clear indication that the words become routine, and the man says simply because have to say.
Concealment of information
Rule of healthy relationships, which people often forget: it is important to have their time, their interests and their friends. In relationships, you don’t get with a partner one. Yes, you may want to spend with him days and nights in the beginning, but if you do not come off from each other for a minute and after five years of relationship, it’s hard to call normal. “However, if you have always been that way, but now partner’s hiding that is found with friends or, say, goes to football, covering this work, you need to understand that the situation has changed, – says the expert on anxiety disorders, Torgerson Kelsey (Kelsey Torgerson). – If the partner is dishonest, speaking about who and where he is, this should make you wonder why he even need to hide this information.”
Physical intimacy (and only)
It is easy to enumerate the building blocks of a perfect relationship – a lot of laughter, enough, strong emotional ties and, of course, regular sex. But when emotional intimacy begins to decline, giving place to the physical intimacy (simplifying: less talk, more sex), the relationship gradually become meaningless. “Especially women, but also men talking to feel important, necessary desirable. So when two people begin to spend more time on sex than communication, this is a clear indication that soon they will have to leave,” sums up Chris Armstrong.
If, during meetings with friends, you just do what you say about your partner (and not just share stories, but always complain that your relationship goes awry), you obviously don’t feel comfortable in this relationship. Just waiting for coffee with her best friend to tell her how “he once again screwed up”? Or can’t wait for Friday, when with a friend at the bar you talk about how “she kept hysteria”? Alas, the relationship was over. “Such behavior indicates that you have lost respect for your partner, says relationship expert David Bennett (David Bennett). Without respect no relationship can grow and bring joy, that’s all.”