Many people perceive the love of self exclusively with a negative connotation, linking it to narcissism, the feeling of grandeur. But as regular studies in the field of psychology, an adequate love of self is an important factor in mental health and inner well-being, allowing you to stay as far away from anxiety and depression.
Especially, experts add, self-esteem is important for those who works too much, constantly trying to beat someone and/or be better than ourselves yesterday. In this strategy a success, of course, there is nothing wrong, but often it is connected with the self-criticism, reluctance to listen to your inner voice and the desire always to do the right thing, not leaving even the slightest margin for error. Guess, about what it speaks? All right, about the presence of unhealthy perfectionism.
Experiments show that perfectionists have a higher risk of several diseases (both physical and mental) in comparison with people who accept and even love their imperfections, they relate to appearance, professional or household skills. And that’s probably the main reason why it is important to cherish yourself.
Any why perfectionism is bad
If you feel that perfectionism is a useful quality that allows people to bring their (or someone else’s) job to perfection, then you are not alone. But it is harmful, scientists believe that compare it with Smoking and obesity. And, no matter if you are talking about light or excessive perfectionism. There is evidence, reminds Medical News Today, confirming that the recovery process after heart disease or chemotherapy perfectionists is noticeably heavier than all the rest. Plus, people with perfectionist tendencies are usually extremely prone to depressive moods.
But what can we do to move away from perfectionism? First of all, recognize that it is anything even slightly useful. Psychologists say that a habit of berating yourself for every little thing will ultimately result in a loss of self-esteem, self-esteem issues and the inability to feel truly happy. The latter is what we all deserve.
According to Kristin Neff (Kristin Neff), Professor of the University of Texas (University of Texas), happiness is something that a person has the right, but not what he should earn. And canadian psychologist Paul Hewitt (Paul Hewitt) compares the inner critic, which is for all perfectionists, “contrary to adults, the spanking of a small child”. Hewitt is convinced that if you spent years cultivating this criticism within yourself you’ve developed an unconscious reflex to submit to his claim over every action, no matter how sometimes it was funny or absurd.
There is one method that will help you if you don’t love yourself first, then at least be kinder to yourself. In this sense, interesting results of an experiment conducted at Harvard medical school (Harvard Medical School) in Boston, in which researchers examined how the training is designed to help perfectionists to stop blaming yourself for every failure. The program included several meditation practices, including those invented by the participants of the experiment mantras aimed at weakening the grip of the inner critic. Something like: “I am the most charming and attractive…”, only on a different topic. And it worked!
As a result, researchers estimate that people with a tendency to perfectionism began to refer to himself and to everything that happens to them, about 43% lighter. Harvard specialists found out that these exercises, obviously, reduce the level of the hormone cortisol and stabilize the heart rhythm, which in turn is directly related to the ability of an organism to cope with stressful situations. And considering how simple and clear are the recommendations, you should definitely try.