07.05.2021

What to say to “I love you” if you don’t feel the same

Love is a very complicated thing, which is easier to do than to understand it. Same with declarations of love which, to some, mean nothing special, so they give them out right and left, and for others, on the contrary, are the limit that they are willing to go only when the man before them really special. And if you belong to the second group, then, faced with a Declaration of love from a partner, can fall into a stupor because you don’t want to lie to him, but at the same time don’t want to hurt the person who dared to say it.

How to respond to the phrase “I love you” if you don’t feel (at least yet) the same to the person who says this to you? To ask, obviously, is to psychologists.

“The first thing you can and should do is say how wonderful that man is decided on recognition, and how are you pleased to hear, says Refinery29, a psychologist at the Powlett Sherman (Paulette Sherman). – Because, you see, regardless of whether you feel the same or not, flattering to know that someone is attached to you so much.” The expert advises to say at least that you appreciate his love. “Then you can thank him with a kiss or a hug to reciprocate the feelings, but nothing more specific, continues Sherman. Or you can say how much you care about him, admit that you like spending time with him, and to note that you are extremely happy with what is happening”.

Psychologists say that you in any case must not make a Declaration of love under pressure, even if you think (or you know) that partner need for emotional tranquility. Tell the person next to you about how important sincerity. And then explain that, although he is one of the main people in your life, you need a little more time to sort out their feelings. “If people will insist on reciprocal recognition, try to explain to him how serious you are about these words, and therefore, do not rush to speak,” says Powlett Sherman.

Your partner may feel disappointed, embarrassed or even a little angry about the fact that you are not ready to admit her love for him in response, but this, experts say, is completely normal. Although if the partner is too angry, that is, they add, could be a sign of emotional immaturity and insecurity.

“If your partner says that if you don’t confess your love to him in response, he would have to find someone else who can do it, or respond to a situation calling for the breakup, it’s immaturity, says Keith Stewart (Kate Stewart), a relationship expert from Seattle. – Everyone needs time to love appeared. And if you need more, you have a full right”.

However, psychologists do not think that if you say “I love you too” in response to the recognition, even if not 100% sure about it, comes to an end. If your partner feels secure in the relationship, he will understand why you are not yet ready to say those three magic words. But, on the other hand, if you feel safe in this relationship, why don’t you save him from the awkwardness and mixed feelings?

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