For each girl, mom is the closest person, best friend and main mentor. How to behave with a daughter in order to raise her a real woman?
1. Play with your daughter
You have a unique opportunity to play the best games for girls again or for the first time in your life: roll dolls in a stroller, swaddle baby dolls, prepare dad from plastic vegetables for your dad, dress up Barbie, play “hopscotch” and ride through an elastic band. As you know, joint games bring together – not for nothing that most teambuilding programs are built on them. And emotional closeness is the key to a harmonious relationship.
2. Do not forget to educate
Of course, a spoiled girl is not as terrible as a spoiled boy, but also not very pleasant. If you don’t want your daughter to grow up selfish, to get into unpleasant stories and frighten friends through her behavior, you will sometimes have to be strict. Stop tantrums, do not engage in manipulations, explain what is good and what is bad. It is especially worthwhile to closely monitor grandparents: it is often they who fill up the granddaughters with gifts, carry on their hands and feed from a spoon until the institute.
3. Do not transfer your experience to your daughter
Of course, the baby is very similar to you, but still she grows up in a completely different time, in a different environment and with other parents. And, besides, she is a personality, moreover, completely unique. Therefore, forget about your experience, except for those of your life lessons that can protect it from danger. For example, if you have been crying and calling mom all day in kindergarten, your girl will not necessarily do the same: maybe she will like it there and she will be happy to run to her friends every morning.
If you had an unhappy love for a high school student at the age of 13, it’s not at all a fact that this feeling will also befall your daughter. And if this happens, it will be a completely different boy and completely different from your situation. Therefore, think carefully before you forbid the girl to skate, because you broke your leg just like that in your childhood, or refuse her requests to go to music school, because “but my parents gave me away, so now I can’t see the violin “.
4. Do not deceive her trust
An ideal mother is one who can tell you everything. She will not scream and curse when you yourself have already realized your guilt. It will not puke, criticize and ridicule your feelings and thoughts. She will not tell anyone about your secrets, not even your grandmother and best friend. She will take your feelings seriously and give practical advice if you ask her. There is no point in hiding something from such a mother, but lies and distrust are the most common problems in the relationship between children and parents.
5. Teach her to help around the house
It’s great when the future wife and mother can and love to cook (even the simplest dishes), monitor the cleanliness and order in the house, iron the clothes and sew buttons. Of course, it’s easier and faster to do everything yourself, sending my daughter to watch cartoons so as not to interfere. But the future son-in-law will definitely not thank you for this… It is better not to refuse the help of the baby, but to accustom her to this from an early age. The ideal age for involving a daughter in household chores is 2-3 years. At this time, the children themselves strive to imitate adults and help them in everything.
6. Create the image of the perfect man
A woman can only be a real woman thanks to men. So, a girl should instill the correct idea of what an ideal man should be. If the crumbs have a clear authority among the strong half (most often it is dad, grandfather or older brother), try not to criticize this person with her, not to speak negatively about him. Phrases like: “Do not repeat my mistakes, do not mess with someone like your father!” can cause severe psychological trauma to the girl.
Better vice versa – emphasize the advantages and positive features of your daughter’s beloved man. At the same time, the ideal image of a girl should be close to reality: if you hit perfectionism, you risk raising a princess who will wait a lifetime for a prince on a white horse.
7. Do not mix roles
Some mothers are very stubborn in their desire to become a girlfriend for their daughter: they either fall into childhood and begin to seriously study the family tree of little ponies, or, conversely, take girls with them to adult events, to visit their friends and so on.
Another common mistake is to require the girl to tell her mother all the details of her life, down to the smallest detail. Let your daughter share some secrets only with her peers, have her hobbies and passions, personal space and time. Mom’s role is special: she’s not only a friend, but also an experienced mentor, teacher, adviser, and there is no reason to refuse these roles.
8. Maintain emotional contact
Even boys are important manifestations of parental love, care and support. What can we say about girls! Be gentle with your daughter, hug more and kiss more, smile at each other, lie in bed together – such moments will tell about your love better than any words.